614
Squi:
Urghh. I just woke up from hibernation to get a glass of water. I'm going back to sleep. Wake me again in six months.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 1:08:55 pm)
Chewing Wax:
You're running some sort of sick squirrel brothel in my chimney aren't you you fat bastard?
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 1:11:18 pm)
Queenie:
Good morning all!
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 1:30:17 pm)
Chewing Wax:
Hello Queenie
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 1:57:41 pm)
m©:
Black powder, and plenty of it...or one of those commercialy available 'Yule Log'..pretty Christmas colours and TOXIC as hell..I'm assuming you want to kill them..otherwise try peanuts and sweet talk.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:04:10 pm)
Chewing Wax:
I think dead would be best. But won't their carcases fall down onto the fire and stink up the place?
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:06:44 pm)
m©:
The moon must be waning gibbous and then use a large chimney sweep brush to dislodge the scorched vermin..Sleepy and Cushca may be able to tell you the right kind as they once swept 'chimbleys squire' in a previous vocation..or so I understand.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:19:22 pm)
Chewing Wax:
Excellent. I think the moon is a waning gibbous right now as a matter of fact.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:20:43 pm)
Chewing Wax:
I've been yelling up the chimney "Get the hell out of my chimney" at which point the chittering stops. A couple discussional chitters follow, and then the chaos resumes. They aren't taking me seriously. This will teach them.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:22:17 pm)
m©:
Excellent.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:22:23 pm)
m©:
If you can get them to eat rhubarb leaves that'll do em'..but how you do that is beyond me.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:23:48 pm)
m©:
When the chittering stops they may me stalking you..be careful, they go for the face.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:24:45 pm)
m©:
The eyes, actually.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:25:33 pm)
m©:
.....I think they got him..
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:30:56 pm)
Chewing Wax:
I swear there's fifty of em up there.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:39:32 pm)
Chewing Wax:
I was wearing my fireproof teflon gloves to reach up there and try to close the lower flu. I could feel them advancing.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:40:11 pm)
m©:
They have no respect for Teflon®..
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:54:57 pm)
m©:
or gloves. They only understand Quisinarts and Weed Whackers.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 2:58:33 pm)
Chewing Wax:
say... that gives me an idea
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:00:03 pm)
m©:
Yeah,.. jam the Weed Whacker's trigger ith duct tape andgo up on the roof.. drop a rope downthe chmney, tie the rope around the Weed Whacker's handle.. then stick it up into your chimney and pull it up through with the rope..like an electric keel-haul..
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:05:11 pm)
Chewing Wax:
I was going to drop the Cuisinart down with a really long power cord. But yours is better.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:06:21 pm)
m©:
use the Quisinart to drop the rope with..get em stirred up a bit first..
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:07:37 pm)
m©:
or use the power cord as a rope that way if the squirrels bite it..squirrel on toast.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:09:54 pm)
Chewing Wax:
This is going to be great.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:13:36 pm)
m©:
Yep..Well I gotta go and hand roll a batch of hemp incense..it sells well in Moochland®..good luck with the squirrels or storks or whatever the grifters are..later
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:17:56 pm)
Chewing Wax:
Later, and thanks for the advise. I might need a little of that incense to get the stink of shredded critter out.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:24:22 pm)
Chewing Wax:
If I had to guess, I think it either racoons or possibly opposum. Just a guess.
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:25:05 pm)
:
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:25:12 pm)
Chewing Wax:
Mean spitting rabid mothers
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 3:45:14 pm)
:
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 4:09:25 pm)
kris:
Hey Ian, do you ever go to parkside candy?
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 4:17:57 pm)
Chewing Wax:
Hi sis. Nope. I've never been there. Why?
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 4:34:11 pm)
:
errrrrruuuuupppp.......'cuse me
(Wed Oct 18, 2000 - 6:38:33 pm)