459
Cushca:
Do people with beards have teeth?
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 9:55:59 am)
Myk Murphy:
ha! evil little girl.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 9:58:58 am)
Dr GB:
So I bought a jacket potato to take away at lunchtime and they put it in a bag with a Christmas tree on it. Freshest food in London, only six months old.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 10:00:43 am)
Dr GB:
An 80 year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him how he was feeling."I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?"The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, "Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day he went out in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun."The doctor continued, "So he was in the woods and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle." "And do you know what happened?" the doctor queried.Dumbfounded, the old man replied "No".The doctor continued, "The bear dropped dead in front of him!""That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must have shot that bear.""That's kind of what I'm getting at..." replied the doctor.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 10:01:44 am)
Dr GB:
I assume Barry and Barry have teeth under the beard. We should ask.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 10:02:13 am)
Myk Murphy:
nothing worse than old potatos... they start growing again. it's quite creepy. london is a wonderful place to get a bite to eat. except the time i actually sat down for a fish & chips meal, playing the tourist. i was not amused.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 10:05:23 am)
Cushca:
I hear that Detroit is a wonderful place to get a bite to eat.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 10:39:50 am)
Dr GB:
Now here's a thing about America. They can't be bothered writing out place names. Example, in England, you have Chatham, Kent. Kent. As in, Kent. In American you have Somehweresville, MA. I mean: what's wrong with writing out the full word? I dunno. You crazy Americans, trying to keep us Brits guessing with your fancy ways.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 11:30:42 am)
Dr GB:
I wish you could all have seen what I just saw. There's sometimes a few tourists hanging about outside going "Wow, this is a shitty bit of London eh", taking photos of the dirt. I just saw a Japanese couple, the guy took a photo of the woman, then the woman took a photo of the bloke. But before that the bloke, replete I might add with a mullet, sat down on the pavement and leaned back on one hand, bent his leg up and put his arm across it. I think he was posing for the cover of a soft-rock ballads collection. It was just beautiful.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 11:38:01 am)
Decoy:
I remember a shitty part of London. We found a hotel in the rain, directed there by a 7 and a half foot tall bobby because we were hopelessly lost and intoxicated. We had come to London to look for a friend and he wasn't in. Stupid because we had no way to contact him - we hadn't planned ahead enough to use the post, so we just went. Well, it didn't go well. We joked about how we were twenty feet below the surface of the Earth in this place, it was true and peculiar - basement hotel rooms. With the analogies to hell, and the tiny little cans of Budweiser, and the Pakistani manager, and the hey hey hey
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 12:10:59 pm)
Cushca:
That's the Dorchester for you.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 12:31:41 pm)
Decoy:
What a mess.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 12:39:24 pm)
:
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 12:43:02 pm)
Decoy:
Mullet?
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 12:47:19 pm)
JR:
Ridin' that train ...
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 12:53:34 pm)
:
The mullet.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 1:00:54 pm)
Myk Murphy:
i once got a basement room at a dive on gower street. it was small, but clean. the filipino owners took excellent care of me. as for our fondness for abbreviation, i think it's reasonable... MA is a bit more pleasant to jot down than "massachusetts". because of the optical scanners, the post office gets grumpy when people don't use the abbreviations and zip codes. we don't like to make them grumpy.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 1:15:26 pm)
Myk Murphy:
...the english signs disappeared, and all things french returned. calais had a certain charm to it, but i had little to compare with it, since it was the only french town i had ever stepped foot in. i was alone in this town, and i spoke hardly a word of french, but i found things agreeable. i began to get hungry at an hour too early for most french dinners, and so i knew i would transgress the unwritten law long before i requested my roast beef sandwich. to perform this transgression, i approached a bistro to see if it was open for business. it was unclear from the outside, but perhaps the attractive woman sitting out front with a poodle would know. somewhere between a sneer and a sigh, as only the french can deliver, she acknowledged that the establishment was indeed up and running. she then rose from her comfort and from her conversation with another woman, and walked into the bistro and walked behind the bar. i sheepishly attempted to apologize for disturbing her while on a break, of sorts, but she wasn't interested. the poodle, meanwhile, followed us in, and stood around my feet while its owner took my order. the order taken, she rejoined a previous conversation with some older folks sitting inside the establishment. i chose to sit outside with my drink and my roast beef sandwich at the table adjacent to the one from which i had inadvertently evicted the proprietor. traffic on the street was sporadic, and nighttime drew much closer. it was a thursday night, as i recall, and so i imagined that all would be quiet. this wasn't exactly the case.
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 10:44:32 pm)
Myk Murphy:
i had made a sort of plan in my head for the evening. the plan was simple: i would proceed to grow steadily drunker, and i would meet people and enjoy myself. never a shy wallflower, my instinct is always to engage others in conversation or some foolishness. tonight would be a perfect night for that. the utter randomness of the night would be perfect: in a strange town, in a strange country, no real knowledge of the native tongue... it could be dull, but travel rarely is when one has the right mindset. add a few drinks, and off you go! so off i went, down the street to some horrid pub with a 1950s americana theme. while simply cliche in the states, it was surreal abroad. despite this, the beer was quite good. i watched those around me, and i felt neither close nor distant to them. i continued my alcoholic voyeurism. i wandered to another bar. (stay tuned for more.)
(Thu Jun 22, 2000 - 10:55:47 pm)
:
SCUBY DOBY DOO...DA DOOBY DOOBY....DA DA DOOBY DOO...DA DA DA DOOBY....IT TURNED OUT SO RIGHT...FOR STRANGERS IN THE NIGHT...
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 2:05:51 am)
Dr GB:
I'm bored. I can't speak to anyone. Wake up, Americans!
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 7:21:59 am)
DM:
C'Mon, work with me here, people!
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 8:49:29 am)
Decoy:
'Morning sleepy-headed Americans and over-caffeinated, tense auslaenders.
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 8:56:49 am)
Myk Murphy:
good morning. sorry i'm late, gb, but this time zone thing is a pain.
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 8:59:29 am)
Myk Murphy:
dennis is going to do monday night football. i gotta see this.
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 9:12:01 am)
Cushca:
Who is Dennis?
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 9:56:31 am)
Decoy:
Hey, its a touchdown, babe!
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 9:57:01 am)
Myk Murphy:
dennis miller, the guy in the photo, is a gifted socio-political commentator/comedian who got his start on saturday night live. he has a show on HBO now.
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 9:59:15 am)
Decoy:
Dennis Miller is a comic/political satirist who used to be on Saturday Night Live. ABC has hired him to do one of the most prestigious jobs in all of sports - announcing on ABC's Monday Night Football. Its quite a big deal to us Americans, our culture may have just been shook down to its roots.
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 10:01:24 am)
Decoy:
At least we agree...
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 10:01:48 am)
Cushca:
I think I should like to be an announcer on ABC's Monday Night Football. I think I should like that very much.
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 10:02:37 am)
Decoy:
He is more of a commentator / picture shower than satirist, actually.
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 10:02:43 am)
Dr GB:
He looks a bit smug to me. Is he very fond of himself?
(Fri Jun 23, 2000 - 10:02:58 am)