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J.R.:

Jodie Foster is a serious rug munching dyke but I'd still like to fuck her brains out!
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 11:55:17 am)
Sleepy:
That's nice.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:02:38 pm)
J.R.:

I'd like to take this opportunity to say I'm deeply deeply sorry for my comments about Ms. Foster. In speaking carelessly and thoughtlessly, I hurt others and for this I beg forgiveness.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:04:20 pm)
Sleepy:
I'm not offended. Please continue if you wish.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:05:48 pm)
J.R.:

A 97-year-old widow of a Baptist minister sent me this piece of advice, a motto she suggests I say daily:

"Thoughts unexpressed sometimes fall back dead, but even God himself can't kill them when they are said."

I think I need to take her advice.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:17:33 pm)

:
sensible
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:21:21 pm)
:
A bloke walks into a pub with an octopus. He sits the octopus down on a barstool and tells everyone in the pub that this is a very talented octopus. He can play any instrument in the world. He hears everyone in the crowd laughing at him ... so he says he will wager £50 to anyone who has an instrument that the octopus can't play. A bloke walks up with a guitar and sits it beside the octopus. The octopus starts playing the guitar like he's Captain fucking Sensible. Another guy walks up with a keyboard, The octopus plays the keyboard better than Monty! So the man pays his £50. A third bloke walks up with bagpipes. He puts them down and the octopus fumbles with 'em for a minute and sets 'em down with a confused look. "Ha!", the man says, "can't you play it?" The octopus says "Play it? I'm going to shag it as soon as I can get its fucking pyjamas off."
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:34:42 pm)
Myk Murphy:
i enjoyed that website... of course, i still have a headache from looking at it! i dig the joke, too.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:43:57 pm)
Corbin:

I don't get it
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:45:17 pm)
Chewing Wax:
Penelope Ann Miller
Gillian Anderson
Umma Thurman
Reneé O'Connor
Kristy Swanson

(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 12:53:43 pm)
Sleepy:
Bye.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:09:14 pm)
Queenie:
David Duchovney
Our Man Robyn
Noah Wylie
Andy Partridge
Ben Affleck

(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:11:12 pm)
Chewing Wax:
Bye Sleepy. Sorry Queenie. They are all gay.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:20:47 pm)
Chewing Wax:
I think I want to switch out Kristy Swanson and put in Laura Dern. Thank you.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:23:16 pm)
Queenie:
I forgot Max Perlich. And they are not! I don't know about Noah Wylie or Ben Affleck, but them other fellas definately are NOT gay.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:26:13 pm)
Queenie:
I'd take Laura Dern over Kristy Swanson any day! Good call.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:26:33 pm)
Queenie:
I have in my posession the first draft of THE STORY. It's pure genius, I tell ya, all typed out on a real typewriter. It's like this precious historic document.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:27:23 pm)
Chewing Wax:
A typewriter? That's fantastic.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:31:12 pm)
:
It was a dark and stormy pychotic episode....
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:40:47 pm)
Queenie:
It begins thusly: I've heard it said (probably from some centuries-old dead limey bastard) that chaos is simplicity in its purest form. Trying to put it to paper makes me question the validity of that statement...but in the final analysis, after the last witnesses have been herded out with an insistent cry of: "Hurry up please, it's time" and everything put to rights for the next day, I know in my heart of hearts that it is true.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 1:57:04 pm)
Chewing Wax:
Bam! T.S. Elliot quote in the first paragraph. Can't go wrong there.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 2:11:29 pm)
Queenie:
is he a centuries-old dead limey bastard?
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 2:17:23 pm)
Myk Murphy:
you better photocopy that story, queenie, and store it in several different places. safety first.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 2:20:09 pm)
Chewing Wax:
I think Elliot was American.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 2:23:44 pm)
Chewing Wax:
The "Hurry up please, it's time"
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 2:29:21 pm)
Queenie:
I only know his kitty poems.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 2:41:24 pm)
Queenie:
Next paragraph: We only pick up on the utter simplicity of it when looking back. The more daft of us try to capture the Chaos. If nothing else, it's good for a laugh.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 2:43:17 pm)
Queenie:
But sometimes, more comes through in the telling of it. A lot more. We find ourselves alive, consumed with the art of the telling, because in doind so we are also learning morea bout ourselves than we ever knew we never knew. And afterwards, the world seems to make that greater bit of sense for it.
But we can't control who we learn from , either. Great lessons rub off all unbeknown, in sad and hungry times when we never see it coming, times with no perspective at all. The times that mean the most in hindsight.
The times that make us great.

(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 3:08:37 pm)
Queenie:
The saddest bastard I ever ran across brought one of those times with him, or showed up in the middle of it and made it clear, is what I mean to say.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 3:09:35 pm)
Queenie:
And more of that stuff. Then the STORY story starts:

The St. Christopher was a single room occupancy residential hotel, more commonly known in yer quaint yank vernacular as an S.R.O. Just south of downtown, 'twas, where artists and industry were slowly being forced out by chain stores and condominiums. But in Fifth and Shipley, the St. Christopher still exhaled the glorious, sleazy, hand-to-mouth character original to the neighborhood as it truly was.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 3:11:56 pm)
:
I'm pissing myself.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 3:35:40 pm)
Queenie:
Ah, go fook yerself!
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 3:55:28 pm)
:
Dont go away mad.
(Thu Mar 2, 2000 - 5:34:13 pm)